{"id":1115,"date":"2025-09-20T11:51:12","date_gmt":"2025-09-20T11:51:12","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.moviestarpoker.com\/?p=1115"},"modified":"2025-09-23T11:41:37","modified_gmt":"2025-09-23T11:41:37","slug":"analysis-of-intergalactic-travelog-reveals-scary-details-about-ufos-cow-abductions-crop-circles","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.moviestarpoker.com\/index.php\/2025\/09\/20\/analysis-of-intergalactic-travelog-reveals-scary-details-about-ufos-cow-abductions-crop-circles\/","title":{"rendered":"Analysis of Intergalactic Travelog Reveals Scary Details about UFOs, Cow Abductions & Crop Circles"},"content":{"rendered":"
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A beautifully illustrated Travelog created by an extraterrestrial tourist was discovered in a rural New Jersey swamp, apparently dropped from one of the hundreds of drones that plagued the Garden State earlier this year. NASA has confirmed that the authenticated diary provides unprecedented insight into previously unexplainable phenomena that have puzzled citizens and scientists alike for decades.<\/p>\n

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Shutterbug<\/em><\/strong> obtained a copy of this otherworldly travel album and shares portions herewith, including summaries of comments and conclusions provided by official UAP\/UFO experts, independent objective observers and my Uncle Tadeusz.<\/p>\n

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The Photos Are Authentic<\/strong>
\nYou’re seeing them here first, Dear Reader, images from the photo travelog of an interplanetary Being who arrived on Earth this summer to hang out with a few of his [or her] peeps and to scare the living hell out of humans. Uncle Tadeusz says they’re friendly; in fact, he dated one.<\/p>\n

Prior to obtaining this enlightening album, NASA had little concrete evidence aside from some blurry video of ultrasonic Tac Tak candy and eyewitness reports from a few flax farmers in Bulgaria, many of whom were sober.<\/p>\n

Images Decoded By Renowned Authority<\/strong>
\nUltimately, after several long weeks of meticulous investigation by leading UFO photography expert Ron Leach, the world has a clearer view of Beings with whom we share the universe.<\/p>\n

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The Beings frequently photograph each other, and have a peculiar fondness for images they take of themselves. They call these pics “selfies,” a name that implies significant vanity.<\/div>\n

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When spaceships are visible to humans, it means their Invisibility Shields are temporarily deactivated. Someone is asleep at the switch; that is, if Beings sleep. Or they could just be yanking our collective chain.<\/div>\n

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Still unconfirmed, Beings appear to have an insatiable fondness for dogs. Cats\u2014not so much. West Highland White Terriers are among their favorites.<\/div>\n

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Photographic evidence contained in the travelog corroborates the speculation that Beings have been covertly living side-by-side with humans for years without detection. Should you suspect that you’ve encountered a Being, don’t panic. And do not tell them you own a dog.<\/div>\n

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Mr. Leach concluded that so-called crop circles are sophisticated intergalactic graffiti and are, in fact, a high form of artistic expression\u2014on the same level as Banksy. They have no intrinsic significance and do not, as some groups have claimed, have any military purposes.<\/div>\n

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Beings frequent popular tourist attractions and have become highly adept at blending in unnoticed, despite the red shadows they cast in sunlight. They routinely practice being rude, make too much noise and wear inappropriate clothing. In other words, they are virtually indistinguishable from locals.<\/div>\n

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It’s not uncommon for Beings to include their home planet or galaxy in their snapshots, just for context. They sometimes draw little arrows pointing to their current location.<\/div>\n

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Despite extensive research, it’s still unclear why Beings abduct cows. Some UFO-ologists maintain it’s their belief that since humans consume 330 million head of cattle per annum (fact) bovine creatures must have supernatural powers. Others claim cows came from outer space originally, and the Beings are simply monitoring their development.<\/div>\n

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Echt Debuts Polygraph Filter for iPhone, Android<\/a><\/p>\n

Discovery of 3-Million Year Old Camera Bag Could Rewrite History: Famous Paleo Something or Other<\/a><\/p>\n

Some Supine Snoozers Suffer Shorter Shutter Speeds – This Habit Can Lead to Premature Exposure & Worse<\/a><\/p>\n

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Conclusion<\/strong>
\nStand on the edge here and jump to your own, if you’re longing for a conclusion. If you’re concerned about what may be at the bottom, only jump half-way down.<\/p>\n

Have I met a Being myself? No. I thought I spotted one at the ShopRite in Poughkeepsie the other day, but it turned out to be a rutabaga turned upside down.<\/p>\n

All we know for certain is Beings dress preppy, tip poorly and drive cars they can’t afford. Yup, they model themselves after 1980s-vintage American Yuppies. Not to be confused with puppies<\/em>, but that’s a story for another time.<\/p>\n

\u2014Jon Sienkiewicz<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A beautifully illustrated Travelog created by an extraterrestrial tourist was discovered in a rural New Jersey swamp, apparently dropped from one of the hundreds of drones that plagued the Garden State earlier this year. NASA has confirmed that the authenticated diary provides unprecedented insight into previously unexplainable phenomena that have puzzled citizens and scientists alike […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1117,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[15],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.moviestarpoker.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1115"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.moviestarpoker.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.moviestarpoker.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.moviestarpoker.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.moviestarpoker.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1115"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/www.moviestarpoker.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1115\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1116,"href":"http:\/\/www.moviestarpoker.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1115\/revisions\/1116"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.moviestarpoker.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1117"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.moviestarpoker.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1115"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.moviestarpoker.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1115"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.moviestarpoker.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1115"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}